Saturday, December 06, 2008

TERRORISM (1,147,995,904-172,800,000=975,195,904):

The first terrorists to step on our holy motherland were white. They called themselves civilized and plundered our land and its people of all our dignity along with our wealth. The natural thing to do is to fight back. Take what is ours. This did not happen, instead we believed in a messiah. A man who claimed we didn’t have to fight because they don’t have enough bullets to kill us. Kalashnikov was just going through its initial stages of development and the Gatling gun was far too unreliable and besides digging graves for millions of people is pure hard work. And Two hundred years is more than enough to transport all the wealth so they got up and left. We didn’t make them. They decided to leave. An eye for an eye doesn’t make everyone blind because always the fittest survive. In the 10,000 years of cultured human living, non-violence has been successful at such a low rate that every instance can be counted by our finger tips. But here we are even today in this day and age where one little bomb can obliterate everything believing in non-violence like fools, fools who believe that their leaders can bring about change. For six decades we have been passive. We have advocated non-violence and suffered in quite dignity. Is this dignity really essential or is this some from of demented ego? Our so called neighbors have exploited us time and again. Now they are on our streets singing along killing people. The terrorist is not worried he knows no matter what he does he still has a high probability of getting away with it. He can attack the parliament and all his family has to do is light some candles and a draw a pretty little poster to grant him mercy and he can be back on the streets singing his favorite tunes, match each beat with a bullet putting a gaping hole into an innocent Indian’s skull. These people should be convicted quicker than the run time of a Hindi movie and executed. Executed brutally, the brutality should only be exceeded by the fact that it is aired live through out the world, along with commentary and cheer leaders. The entire demented notion of heaven and 72 virgins should be the last thing a terrorist craves. The death has to be a symbol; a symbol which says Gandhi died so did ahimsa. The next obvious step to do is rid the world of this cancer. When a person has a cancerous region on his leg, his leg is chopped off to save his life the same rule applies here. We have a population of 1,147,995,904 and Pakistan has 172,800,000. Even if you go by Gandhi’s theory of eye for an eye, we will still have 975,195,904 people to carry ahead our great culture. If a terrorist can die for 72 virgins, I can surely die for my country.


Amol said...

Awesome Brother!!! Jai Hind!!

anand said...

kickass stuff bro!!de last closing sentences awesome macha...

phatcougar said...

@Amol and Anand
People were hunting to scalp me when I wrote this I'm happy you guys appreciate it.

summer-diary said...

Honestly speaking, initially I thought you were mocking at the theory of 'an eye for an eye', and then I realized you too have been swayed by this sudden surge of zingoism in Indians. A let down brother.

BTW, that 'feeling happy' joke was awesome :D you thought of it ?

phatcougar said...

Sorry buddy I did get a lotta flack for this one. The feeling of helplessness drove me to write this. It might be wrong but I kinda felt like I had to do this.

I told you abt my Sardar friend, well he forwarded this joke to me.
My favorite Sardar joke.

somebody said...


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