Morbid Reflections

Birthdays: I love my birthday coz I’m one step closer to my final destination. It marks the end of one agonizing year on this damn planet. But I don’t understand why chirpy people who listen to backstreet boys celebrate birthdays. This actually shows their degree of patheticness [crappy grammar I admit]. Right now I’m at a point where I despise happy people or maybe I’m just jealous.
Birthdays are one thing but searching for a birthday gift is an entirely different and when it involves someone that you care for it gets on your nerves a little bit.
It was my friend’s birthday a couple of months ago. First let me tell you what he is like. He is an extremely nice guy, little arrogant, well built and thinks he is the long lost brother of superman and he is very creative and gifted. This is a hard combo. So searching for a gift to give him is like searching for Jesus in hell. Even though you find him the search will be tiring. So I went out searching for a gift. I had my searching lights on and I searched every gift shop but nothing. He is a perfectionist so its that hard to give him a gift.
Then while walking around I saw a chemists store thought I’ll give him a pack of condoms but he doesn’t have a girl friend, so that idea was screwed. Then I saw this awesome lingerie store [no neither of us are gay]. I thought I’ll give him a bra and give him a note saying “fill it up with a women that is my gift to you”, but no I don’t have the balls to do it. Even if I did and if his mother found out about this she would crush them.
Then at last I found this marijuana smoking hippy skeleton with reggae colored Mohican. I fell in love with that little guy and that’s what I gave him. Probably he’ll be cursing me every time he looks at it. But he had a smile on his face when he opened that box and all those curses are worth it.
The very recent birthday that I attended was of one of my friends. Now it’s a female. I know its pretty odd for me to have a female friend but I consider her to be one of my dearest friends even if she doesn’t do the same.
Shopping for a gal is an entirely different story. I learnt that given a gal a gift isn’t the easiest thing in the world. I thought for months about the perfect gift to give her. But the only thing that was in my favor was that she is a female version of me in every way possible we both think so much alike that it freaks me out a little bit. So I know that whatever I like she would like too. Some times I think if everything was so easy. Well at last I gave her a tacky watch. I think its time for me to go.