BOLLYWOOD: It was a very peaceful fight. Nobody was bruised but they were battered beyond recognition. The Hero wanted the Villain to kill him but the Villain wanted to die at the hands of the Hero. The leading lady was a tramp. Which lead to the conflict at the first place and the fact that the Hero and the Villain weren’t brothers didn’t really help anyone.

This was very similar to a lot of fights between non siblings. The siblings were all murdered in the beginning of the book so that everyone automatically became a single child to their parents. The parents had the ill fate of choosing who lives and who dies.

This brought tears to the movie goers’ eyes. The crowed relished every second of drama unleashed before their tear filled eyes. Were they tears of pain or tears of joy were the topic of research for a renowned psychiatrist from a lesser known far away land. The sibling who was intended to die fought till he died, if he hadn’t fought he would be dead anyways. But the one who was victorious was not victorious over death because death always knows where you live.

Coming back to the story that hangs in the balance. The balance of life and death. The Hero and the Villain both born to different parents, fate has put them in the position of siblings. One has to die. They want blood, but their own.

Both have very low self esteem, both are in love with a tramp. The Hero shot the Villain with a knife. The Villain lived to tell the tale. The telling of the tale killed the Hero of embarrassment. He finally got what he wanted but did he deserve it?

WORD ASSOCIATION: What comes to your mind when you hear the word beauty? What comes to your mind when you hear the word violence? What comes to mind when you hear the word peace? We associate an image with every word in our head. When you hear your best friends name called out. You have his image in your mind. If you are afraid of a snake, the word snake will automatically bring terror in front of your eyes.
What if that can be changed? What if every word in your head can be given a whole new image to be associated with. Its like this, you have an image of a beautiful girl in your head. When you think about beauty that’s what pops up in your head. Then one day you see someone more beautiful walk past you. That older image is automatically substituted by the new one. Now think of beauty and you will think of the second girl.
Similarly what if the bad things are disassociated too. You think of violence and you have an image of people being killed brutally with their hands and torso torn out with blood smears all over the place. Now you train your mind to dissociate it completely. So much so that the next time you hear the word violence there is nothing but a blank sheet with “bad” written on it.
Like wise I’m trying one more thing consciously these days. I want to remove all the negatives from my conversation or at least my thought process as much as possible. I always have a list of people in my mind whom I hate and now I would rather say, I not fond of them. Every instance you say the word hate, somewhere in the subconscious you know you are not supposed to use that. This is going to be an on going experience. I will let you know about the results too.

FATIMA BHUTTO: Little Birdie came from across the border. Where things aren’t so green. She looked like she deserved better. She sings a sad song of betrayal and misfortune on her and her kind. Is she looking for shelter? Or is she looking for a shoulder to cry on? Maybe she wants someone to lend an ear.
Little birdie is smart as she is beautiful. She looked to her neighbors who are rivals for ages. She sings the songs of blood and sword: betrayal is at its core. She loves the freedom of thought but is imprisoned in her own.
Her eyes have seen a lot of pain. Her tears want to bring about a change. She loves her little country and the countrymen alike; even after so much violence she thinks there is room for change. She wants to clip her own wings just to stay back and help.
The people in our land are skeptical for we have seen bloodshed galore. Do we trust the little Birdie? Do we believe in her songs? She tells us it’s not the people, people from both the countries are kind, it’s the kings and the king’s men who control the game. Setting bounty on the good ones, until there are no more. One of the Noble men says, her beauty might be an illusion meant to confuse us all. Her beautiful voice meant to hypnotize our souls. But I believe in the little Birdie, hope she doesn’t fall.

Growth: Everyone talks about growth in life. True growth occurs when you shed your negatives and embrace only your positives. Let the light shine and the darkness fade away. The other day I was having a conversation about this with one of my friends and he said that if at all this is done then the real person is lost. When we meet someone and become friends we appreciate the good in him and acknowledge the bad. This makes him what he is and this is the person whose friendship we cherish. I don’t agree with this. When I’m friends with someone I make sure I tell them what they are doing wrong. Some people don’t realize when they are doing something wrong since the wrong that they commit

has somehow been justified in their mind and has become a part of them. If they can change that and move towards being a great person from a good one, that’s something I would love to see.
I have had a lot of people tell me it’s not easy to do the right thing all the time. I’m not asking everyone to be a saint. The major obstacle people find in their lives ahead of greed is laziness. When you are just lazing around ask yourself, “Can I be doing something else that will enrich my life instead of what I’m doing now?”. Invariably the answer will be, “Yes”. Just go for it. It’s quite simple. The best part of doing something or the other all the time is that you don’t get time to dwell in your own misery. Every day will get brighter and brighter. To this if you can add shedding your negatives, every day will seem like a dream.

SAYINGS: I’m the kind of guy who likes to read billboards and things written on the walls even if it asks me to go home and try to have an intercourse with myself. This rant is for all the women out there who wear these smart t shirts and think I’m staring at their boobs. Well,I’m not. I’m trying to read the so called smart quotes on your t-shirt. If you really know me then you would also know that I’m a butt man, unless you have boobs like Sophia Vergara (to all the guys, google it). If you do then they have to be fake and I don’t like fake ones and trust me, guys can make out the real ones from the fake ones so
don’t even try. Now coming to all the crap on your t-shirt. We expect to read
something smart not stupid. No “Fish fuck in water so don’t drink water”. That’s just disappointing and it exposes the kind of humor that you like. Besides it’s not even worth getting a slap for reading that from a hot chick no matter how kinky you are. If you really want to make my life hard get something on your butt. I wouldn’t know whether to read or to look. It might send me into an epileptic fit. But again you wouldn’t know whether I’m looking or reading. If I have a smile on my face then I’m probably looking given that you have a good butt, else I’m disappointed at your butt or I’m disappointed at the saying. This is quite complicated. So next time you are wearing pants with sayings on them google “Keyra Augustina”.(Guys, If you haven’t seen it, you guys are idiots and need to google it right now). I'd give her a hundred out of ten. If you still think you want to wear those pants then you deserve to wear them. The whole t-shirt thing can backfire if you really want to attract some good looking guys. I will explain how. There is this friend of mine who gets a panic attack whenever he enters a bookstore. His face turns red and we drag him outside so that a stray dog can perform CPR on him. If all girls start wearing t-shirts with sayings he might turn gay or kill himself and ninety percent of all men I know are allergic to books. Actually this whole thing can work in my favor. With ninety percent of all men gone my odds look much better. So to all the women who read this, forget about it as a bad dream.

Contibutions by Jagadish Puttaraju

CHANGE : I can feel enormous change in me. I look inside for all of my answers now. I’m understanding all my limitations and trying to push them to accommodate more of me. I feel the need to grow and spread my wings. When you realize where you stand as an individual as compared to where you want to be the next day or a month after that or a decade after that you start unraveling the path on which you need to proceed. This also tells you the amount of work one needs to put in to walk that road let alone reach a goal. This is the point where people turn back and settle for something lesser and more comfortable. The mountain looks too torrid to be able to chisel into a beautiful sculpture even though you know it’s hidden in there. If you think I’m talking about success you have mistaken. I’m not talking about achieving a desired goal but the path in which you need to proceed and the joy that brings you regardless of the end result. The end result is for people to see but what really counts is the experience. Experiencing a beautiful sunset on a beautiful beach is more important than taking a picture and showing it to your friend. As you sweat it out to create something beautiful you aren’t thinking about anything but what you are working on. Once completed people might hate it or love it, they are getting a glimpse into your psyche when you created it, but they can never experience what you felt when you created it. Don’t settle for comfort; settle for what your heart really desires.
One more thing has changed in me in the recent times. I still don’t know whether it is for the better or for the worse. Before when I used to see people who have potential I would be hell bent on making them realize this. I would talk to them and try and get them to see it. Lately I’ve realized that everyone has potential and everyone has something unique to offer to the world. There are lots of reasons that differentiate the ones who are doing something about it and the ones who don’t.
The first reason - some people are just too lazy to do anything. They would sit and criticize a guy who is doing awfully in the area of their expertise. They know they can do better than the other person but won’t. The reason being they are just too lazy to get off their asses and do anything about it. The worst kinds are the ones who are proud of the fact that they can do better, not do anything, yet think the rest of the world is beneath them.
The second reason – some people do not like risk. They would do anything to reduce risk. I believe in taking at least one shot at something that you are passionate about. I would hate to get old and think I should have taken that shot when I could. Even if doesn’t work out you know you tried. That would be your personal screen saver in your head in troubled times. Sometimes life kicks you so hard in the groin that you would not want to take anymore risk. I understand these people and what they are going through but I don’t necessarily agree with them. When you are down and out that’s when the real you emerges, if he is strong you will soar to heights beyond imagination and limits. The best part is everyone one of us is strong.
Coming back to what has changed in recent times. I no longer spend my time and energy in making people realize their potential. I know that they haven’t achieved that stage of awareness to realize all the beautiful things hidden inside them. I just hope someday they wake up and look inwards before it’s too late for them and the world.

SWEENEY TODD :Life is like a hair cut you never know what you are going to get. I had a bad hair cut today and being an optimist up until the last moment I kept thinking it’s going to get better. It’s like watching a bad movie, you wait for the twist in the tale and hoping it’s not the twists that you have in mind. The result – “A twisted Hair cut”.

There are different kinds of hair cut blunders; one of them is falling asleep when getting a hair cut. The rhythmic sound of the blades sliding across each other can be quite sleep inducing, especially with all the crappy music playing in the background. This would be less painful if you stick to sleeping on the chair and not dreaming. Imagine this, you are dreaming about yourself getting a haircut and dozing off, while you are sleeping in the chair and dozing off. You dream about the barber cutting off your ears, wake up screaming to find a piece of your ear hanging off the metal blades.

If you thought demon barbers only exist in movies and novels think again for they are dime a dozen where I live. The first kind, are the ones who think they are masters of chiropractic treatments and spine adjustment. They pretend to be cutting your hair and when you least expect it they wrap their hands around your neck and twist it like the ninjas do in the old martial arts movie. If it resulted in death it could have been appreciated. Instead, what you are left with is your spine yanked out of your body and readjusted to fit into your wallet. If you sit down and explain how that hurts and doesn’t really work, he starts blaming you for not sitting still. He also claims to have treated Stephan Hawkings who walked out of his shop on his own two feet. He also goes on to tell me that Christopher Reeves was supposed to be his next customer but he ended up going to his rival and we all know what happened next.

The next kind, are the ones who don’t believe in personal hygiene. Sometimes you don’t doze off at the chair but you fall unconscious due to the foul odor coming from the barber’s arm pits when he raises his arms to cut your hair. You somehow gain consciousness to keep your vanity in check and to keep your beloved ones from being massacred beyond the point of growth. All this, to be beaten back to submission by bad breath.

Finding the right barber is like finding your soul mate. She makes you feel good and look good too. Until then every relationships ends with you having to pay for it some way or the other.

POTS AND PANS: Life changing experiences doesn’t have to be a near death experience. Life changing experience is just the moment where you wake up in life. You realize your stupidity but we are like cauldrons filled with boiling negativity and bad choices. Its when this spills over that we really feel the burn. Our aim is simple, cool all the emotions inside and start emptying the cauldron. Once it’s clean we can reuse the same to fill in the good things in life
I have seen people work till they become machines. The only difference being machines don’t complain. They negate all the good work they do by complaining so much. When things aren’t going your way only then will the true you emerge. Stop complaining and focus on the good things, is what all the great saints will tell you but this is hard to practice. The easiest thing to do when things get tough is not to think at all. Its almost poetic, hum a song. Be blank. This I learnt from a life changing experience that I had about two years ago when I was at my miserable best. It helped that I went away from it all but again I was still in my body and my body was a mess.
Recently I had another one. I have always done things my way, never did anything to please anyone. Took my own road, the less crowded one that life offers. Even with whatever I do, be it writing or drawing, I never waited for any kind of validation from people. My motto has always been, I will do something in life which gives me satisfaction, and the world can burn in hell.
This has worked for me till now for I can find at least a few souls who agree with me, sometimes sympathize with me or find me curious enough to look at what I have to offer. Few weeks ago one of my close friends decided to get into business and more specifically into the food industry. I asked him whether he was in it for the money. He said no. I asked him whether he was in it because of his love for fine cuisine. He said no. I kept at it till nothing seemed to justify why he was getting into it. So my narrow mind was stuck at all these little materialistic and sometimes ego centric landscapes. Finally I gave up and asked him to spill it out. This is what he told me, “I want to do something that gives joy and satisfaction to people, and provides me enough to keep my passions alive".
My cauldron is a little less filled because of my friend Prashant.

MONEY: What if you can give someone everything that they ever wanted? If someone likes life, give them immortality. If someone likes freedom, give them wings to soar away from limitations. At this point in time I don’t have the ability to bestow people with neither immortality nor do I posses the knowledge to free people from their earthly bounds.

There are these people in this world that I can help, at least to gain momentary happiness. These are people who love money, not your average miser who calculates everything. I’m talking about a guy who weighs everything in terms of profit and loss. This is a guy who thinks if he talks too much he spends these many calories in turn he has to eat more food, which would lead to spending money on food so, as a logical solution keeps his mouth shut at all times.

For these people money is everything, they rank it higher than relationships, sometimes higher than freedom.

Do not confuse these people with the impoverished. The poor need money to survive; these people on the other hand want money so that they can be happy. They might even have more money than you but that doesn’t really matter since they need more. So why not give it to them. Even if you have only ten rupees, give them five. You can see true joy in their eyes. It’s the same joy you find in people’s eyes when they meet their long lost love after years of separation. It’s the same joy you see in a mother’s eye when their first kid is born. All this joy cost you was five rupees.

FICTION:

Guy1: Dude the letter you asked me to give her totally bombed, she started crying, called me a pervert and said if I ever get near her she will call the cops on me. The worst part was, she said, she hates me.

Me: So, it worked.

Guy1: What?

Me: Precisely. She has to hate you passionately. Then we can convert that passion into love. Remember passion cannot be created nor destroyed but…

Guy1: So. What do I do next?

Me: Do you know who Shah Rukh Khan is?

Guy1: Yes.

Me: Crap. Do you know who Joy Mukherjee is?

Guy1: No.

Me: Excellent. He was like Shah Rukh Khan, but with less epilepsy. In an old movie he goes to this girl who hates her, whips out a knife and says, I will stab this knife into my arm if you don’t stop me and say you love me. If you don’t, I will rip out my heart and throw it at your feet.

Guy1: What happened next?

Me: What do you think? The girl stopped him. They fell in love and got married. Add in about 8 songs and that’s what happened.

Guy1: Cool man. So get a fake knife?

Me: Hell no. This is what makes you an idiot. Fake knife will never bring out the fear and passion in you. She takes one good look at that trembling hand and she is all yours.

Guy1: Thanks bro, you are a life saver.

Guy2: Dude, did you hear what happened to Guy1?

Me: He stabbed himself in the arm?

Guy2: How did you know?

Me: Have you heard of premonition?

Guy2: Is that the girl in Bio-tech first year?

At the hospital.

Me: Did you use a fake knife?

Guy1: Does this wound look fake to you?

Me: Well, Debatable. Anyways, I guess she turned out to be a psycho. How could she stand there and not do anything.

Guy1: She did, she called the cops.

Me: What does that tell you about her?

Guy1: She has the cops’ number on speed dial?

Me: No you idiot. She is not the one for you. There are plenty of fish in the sea and lots of girls on the beach.

THE WHO MAKES YOU WRITE: I have realized something about myself today. I can’t be happy with normal. I can adapt to it but won’t be happy. All these events in the past ten years have made me realize that I was not meant to conform to the lifestyle that is pushed upon us by the media. For that matter anything.

My inner self is not happy with anything around me which even slightly resembles normalcy. That doesn’t mean it’s not good for you. It only emphasizes the fact that if you like them we will never get along, for that matter you won’t even get me no matter how hard you try. Which might be a good thing for both of us. Trying to figure out who we are is a process which takes a long time. When you do you realize that, you have only dug the tip of the iceberg and now you are cold, sinking and afraid to drown in your own self.

Even success seems to be enslaving. I don’t get jealous when someone gets a dream job with a seven figure salary. It’s good for that person who has dreamt of that moment all his life.

What do I want from life? I don’t know. What will make me happy? I don’t know. So what have I learnt from all these experiences. Well, I know what I don’t want.

The mystery to me is, when people dream, why do they always get tangled up with the notion of a good job and lots of money and the urge to settle down in life? Let me try and break this down a little bit.

Firstly, when you are dreaming about the ideal life, why would you ever want to work? My ideal future would be not to work. Just do something that I like and maybe even get paid for it. We are raised to work for others. I wouldn’t call working for someone a dream but a subconscious awareness of what needs to be done to be successful according to the parameters of the society.

Secondly, lots of money. Why lots of money? If money amounts for happiness, I would have always worked towards the perfect bank heist. Money is a like a hot trophy girlfriend with lots of baggage. The sex is good but the next morning you feel like the roles have been reversed and you are stuck with an overwhelming feeling of being screwed. Money is important but it’s not everything. I wouldn’t dream of being the richest man alive. I would hope that I make enough to survive and make enough to keep my passions alive.

Thirdly, settling down in life. I never understood this. The world is a big place even though people claim that it has become smaller. I believe the contrary. People make the world what it is and as the number of people grows so does the world. Every person you meet accounts to a new experience, only if you are open to such poetic notions. Why would you want to settle down and read about events in the newspaper while you can go out there and be a part of it. I want to be a nomad and experience things, than be some guy whishing to grow the balls to get out there and live free.

Breakdown everything and analyze it, then you will realize we are being hollowed out. They just want us to be remnants of absolute freedom that once roamed this earth with its head held high. Nowadays they are going a step further by shoveling in as much as self pity, depression, greed, consumerism and sloth as they possibly can. By the time you cleanse yourself of all these you are fighting to get out of a coffin banging on the door. Trying to tear way the latch with your bear fingers while they ground down to your bones. Wake up from your lousy dream and dream beyond even the possibility of what life has to offer and what death can take away. Dream with your eyes open.

THE VIEW: You can see the water. Your eyes tell you there is water in front of you. Only one of your senses is satisfied. Next step is to feel it. Don’t you want to touch it? Or do you want the water to touch you?
The banks look beautiful. You might think you are in heaven. Everything around you is beautiful. Go. This is it, you think. This is the heaven you had in mind when grandma first told you about heaven. This was her vision, this is what she wanted you to see and finally you have arrived. This should satisfy you. Clear your brain of all the rotten pollution of your mundane life. Looking at the water soothes the soul. Calm. Not boasting. You keep wishing to be a part of the scenery. Finally, a part of something beautiful. Step in; still everything around you is beautiful. You plunge into the water.
Then at that moment where you thought you had finally discovered beauty is where you know how mediocre your image of beauty is. The water and everything in it, transcends to a degree which is incomprehensible to your futile mind. The rays of light reflecting back from the peaceful creatures passing through the clear blue water and hitting your eyes sends shock waves through your brain. Every Grey cell soaking it up, like never before. Your mind rolls back the seconds to a place in time where beauty had a different meaning. You understand that this is just the surface. Feel like scratching? There has to be more than just beautiful banks. More than what your grandma told you. More than just radiating water. Are you ready? Are you ready to take the plunge?

EC-32: Time can’t be measured.

It’s all relative.

Maybe what I’m writing here is fiction in its purest form. Fragments of my imagination delivered at one bit per nano second.

It’s all crazy.

If it can’t be measured can we somehow reach the speed of light? Einstein proved that it can’t be done. Actually he proved that matter can’t accelerate to those speeds. You are thinking early signs of Alzheimer’s. I’m thinking the same.

Underwear inside. Check.

Pants outside. Check.

Super heroes were our models when we were young. You really should be ashamed of yourself. My theory is maybe we can slow things down. We can’t reach the speed of light but somehow we can slow it down.

Q 1. a) What are the benefits of slowing down time?

Answer: The benefits are as follows –

1. One can analyse each and every word that is emitting from the subjects mouth. Every expression can be watched, registered , computed and the output is stored in the main memory of the central processing unit.

2. In the situation of a social gathering of human subjects, the above mentioned experiment is conducive in obtaining a liquid which quenches thirst made by one of the capitalistic giants before others in the test enclosure can reach for it.

3. Oxygen is a requirement for combustion to take place. Filters in bikes provide air (containing Oxygen) for internal combustion to take place. Cigarette also burns with the help of Oxygen. Internal combustion of the soul. Smoked heart soup definitely not for the faint hearted.

The above statement holds good because the slowness of time gives you enough time to grab the poisonous concoction and put it to your lips.

4. The smoked filled atmosphere when slowed down can resemble a cloud cover

over the newly bought computer. The new age parents, fitness trainer, companion on lonely nights. The cloud cover and the halo are essential and can be viewed only when time is slowed down by 82.38% (all other values are considered ideal)

Slowing down time is a dream for anyone addicted to speed. Acceleration is the elixir but the feeling of time slowing down at whim after crossing 100 miles per hour feels almost spiritual.

Slow can be exciting but what about absolute control over time? Time and space when together seem rather far fetched. For now we just stick to time. Freeze it. All movements stopped. Silence engulfing the space around you. Pervert’s dream and a Saint’s destiny. Different things mean different for different people. Grammar is relative. Relativity stretched until the point of snapping. Releasing the finger is as dangerous as stretching it further.

Q. 2 c) What are the advantages of freezing time?

Answer: The advantages of freezing time are as follows –

1. Every major incident in one’s life can be frozen, captured and documented by using database management system.

2. Beauty that surrounds you in every form can be touched without you being stamped a pervert. Sense of touch is one of the five senses of a human along with sight, smell, taste and hearing.

3. Thought can be stopped. The clutter of waves hitting each other making that tingling sound which gives you a brain freeze can be avoided. Serenity.

I have only 7 internal marks. I need 43 to pass.

43+7=PASS

PS: I hate begging bit it’s a critical subject please do understand.

NUMBERS:
51 and newone rhymes.
51 and newone rhymes.

Then 51 and newone are the sameone.

TERRORISM (1,147,995,904-172,800,000=975,195,904):



The first terrorists to step on our holy motherland were white. They called themselves civilized and plundered our land and its people of all our dignity along with our wealth. The natural thing to do is to fight back. Take what is ours. This did not happen, instead we believed in a messiah. A man who claimed we didn’t have to fight because they don’t have enough bullets to kill us. Kalashnikov was just going through its initial stages of development and the Gatling gun was far too unreliable and besides digging graves for millions of people is pure hard work. And Two hundred years is more than enough to transport all the wealth so they got up and left. We didn’t make them. They decided to leave. An eye for an eye doesn’t make everyone blind because always the fittest survive. In the 10,000 years of cultured human living, non-violence has been successful at such a low rate that every instance can be counted by our finger tips. But here we are even today in this day and age where one little bomb can obliterate everything believing in non-violence like fools, fools who believe that their leaders can bring about change. For six decades we have been passive. We have advocated non-violence and suffered in quite dignity. Is this dignity really essential or is this some from of demented ego? Our so called neighbors have exploited us time and again. Now they are on our streets singing along killing people. The terrorist is not worried he knows no matter what he does he still has a high probability of getting away with it. He can attack the parliament and all his family has to do is light some candles and a draw a pretty little poster to grant him mercy and he can be back on the streets singing his favorite tunes, match each beat with a bullet putting a gaping hole into an innocent Indian’s skull. These people should be convicted quicker than the run time of a Hindi movie and executed. Executed brutally, the brutality should only be exceeded by the fact that it is aired live through out the world, along with commentary and cheer leaders. The entire demented notion of heaven and 72 virgins should be the last thing a terrorist craves. The death has to be a symbol; a symbol which says Gandhi died so did ahimsa. The next obvious step to do is rid the world of this cancer. When a person has a cancerous region on his leg, his leg is chopped off to save his life the same rule applies here. We have a population of 1,147,995,904 and Pakistan has 172,800,000. Even if you go by Gandhi’s theory of eye for an eye, we will still have 975,195,904 people to carry ahead our great culture. If a terrorist can die for 72 virgins, I can surely die for my country.

SOUND: Flawed sounds make sounds beautiful. The most beautiful things lose their beauty in the eyes violating them, abusing them, molesting them. Sounds go directly to the heart bypassing the brain in an attempt to reach those deep dark secrets once so beautiful, you guarded them with your life. Life tends to lose its meaning while sounds leave your heart. The laughter, the bitter cry, the burst of anger and the most important sound. The sound of pain. Scream until the pain goes away. Scream till the blood dries and the tears can’t find their way onto the cheeks. Blow out your eardrums, but you can still hear. You can hear your heart race, rhythm of life, rhythm so beautifully coordinated. Miss a beat and the world ends. The world ends for you and only you. No more sounds. Then it happens again. The sound of hope. The cries end and the eye hopeful. Change nears a blink away. Illusion.

DRIVEL: Stop. Don’t proceed further. My legs take me reluctantly pain engrossing every part of my body like wild fire. I started loving pain, it’s like a drug stays with you, while you walk, stand, sit and even in your sleep. The companion whom you never wanted but who has been there for you in times of trouble and joy. Constantly reminding you that you are just a head on collision away from your destination.
Stop. Thinking never goes away. Mind needs rest but I don’t listen. I don’t listen to anyone. The kind of rebel that starts with the letter “L”. This can go on forever. I have tried for two decades. This is not a disease this is who I am. This is me.
Stop. This is not good. I shouldn’t go in. The whole thing is really funny. Funny as in normal funny, not as in Giri funny. Today I’m thinking twice to step into a mart what will happen tomorrow. I won’t even be able to get out of the house. Look around. Things lots and lots of things. Everyone wants to feed their ego. Children can go to hell. Teenagers to a much worse place – “Franchise coffee shops”. Ego has a massive appetite. It is known to swallow whole countries. How do you kill the ego without killing someone? Still learning, these classes aren’t for free. Currency insanity, credit is over rated.
Stop. You are traveling at 100 kms per hour on a road which resembles the surface of the moon. A beautiful song resonates in your head as time seems to slow down. That’s the moment that can be relived for ever. Stop. The moment just betrayed you. The track in your head changes, now you can hear only the voices of people who put you down all your life. All you can see in front of you are the images you wanted to forget so desperately. Twist the wrist, 120. Wrong lane 120. Behemoth of metal carrying tons of steel honking its mighty horn. The wide grin on your face is asking for more. 130. Stop!

MYSORE STUFF: Have you ever noticed how in old Hindi porn movies the background score is always some beautiful Md. Rafi song. Guess what they will be playing in frog porn in the swamp land? Two frogs fucking each other’s brains out. Croak, Croak, Croak…..instead of all that orgasmic moaning. Instead of croaking think about a seductress moaning….ooooohhhh’s and aaaaahhhhh’s. Say it out loud oooohhhhh, aaaaahhh now in the same tone try Croak, Croak, Croak…….
We have established the fact that you can have a successful career up ahead in dubbing for frog porn. Let’s get back to the original question. Gibberish has that effect on you. You forget the question, the discussion; you remember nothing, a void in your memory.
So there goes another train of thought completely out of control a million miles an hour right at the sun. Intergalactic 9/11 everyone mourns, you didn’t get that either. I know. You are a moron and I’m a genius.
Let me try and explain. The train is an Intergalactic space craft shaped as a train. Taking people to their destination, you know transportation. You know like Indian Railways, rainways, drainways, sewage and filth ways. Lot of names one meaning, you know, like synonyms or like they are alike or the same, you know whatever. Now imagine a hot blonde you know like one from the Victoria’s secret catalogue. Like the model Heidi Klum. I still can’t believe she married Seal. You know the singer. Yes the guy with the crater face. You know you might say that he has a good voice and sounds nice but he is no Mother Theresa. She was a hippy who had too many horse tranquilizers. You should watch “The Dark side of Porn”. Download bitch. “Piracy Zindabad!” so I just found out that Ramdoss is planning to ban lollipops coz it corrupts our youth. By helping them get YOU KNOW. This is a scale. All the nasty things that you substituted for that YOU KNOW determines how fucked up you are. I KNOW you are fucked up. Tall and high buildings everywhere - subliminal message. It’s not an IQ test. Primates confirmed proceed. Opposable thumb, proceed. I’m not even going to try and explain Audioslave to you. Sagar lies. They rock.
The spot of my girlfriend is taken. Suzuki Shaolin 138.2 cc, 12 bhp actually its only 11.8 bhp. I lied, so does everyone else. D’s not C’s. Get your eyes checked. Trophies with asses are what they are. Ass definitely more important than boobs. Message sent out and delivered. I’m horny and I’m waiting. Angie will do.
Met a man locked away – Exploder. I’m not going to explain. Do some research bitch. Google – Exploder+lyrics. Read it and get back. I’m here waiting. Gay messages flashing in neon. So you are back. Read it and get back was so gay. I’m sorry. Gay messages work I’ve seen my friend pick up girls with it. Shh! I’m not a squealer. So now you are confused or extremely happy that you have understood the entire thing. Go back to YOU KNOW. Now you know you are dangerous coz you are a smart pervert. I completely understand since I’m one. Look back at all the things we discussed lets just add one small detail. Bangbus and Dirty Sanchez rock. Preston is stupid. If you are confused we can proceed further.
This song should help. Getaway Car. I don’t have to tell you to Google it. Chasing cyclones is a nice slimily to what’s happening in your brain. Buckle up Mister. Mindfuck launch in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…..lift off. All fancy, “shit understood” on your mouth will get me a forgotten smile on my face. Not just shit, then it just tastes awful. The meter kicks in and I’m perverted to the core. If I were a genius there would be shit on each and every one of your fuckers mouth. Sudhanshu was right; lot of fucks in the speech doesn’t make this Scarface. Intelligent fucker! Sorry buddy I just figured fucker is better than fuckless. So here is where I get the idea of a sequel in my mind. Yes, Sarith I’m a capitalist. I’m a lot of things a pervert, almost genius, and a capitalist.
Angie was the last thing. We start where I ended and go back in time and space. Breadcrumbs will help you retrace your steps given there aren’t any birds flying by. So we were talking about beauty which refers to my bike, with specifications to make you understood how beautiful and it rocks. It’s like Audioslave, they both rock. I know and Sagar knows it too. Primates with very high IQ were our ancestors who found music. This reverts to my humble invention of the pervert meter which was supposed to be just a subliminal message. The felony is explained in the subsequent lines referring to a tragedy which rocked the world. Corrupt people banning corrupt things, that’s the definition of corruption, Share people, we got enough. People are dying and you are stuck on piracy. You are pirates peddling human misery. Pirates were pussies compared to you.
Some how “The dark side of porn – Animal Farm” and “Mother Theresa” hit the same nerve in my mind. By now I don’t have to tell you to refer to the pervert and genius meter. Ranking 1, the best, numero uno. Small bubble I live in. Seal looks like a saint; I’m sure by now you are getting the groove. Again if any doubts persist feel free to go to you tube and type in “Seal”. If you didn’t understand, “Thank you for playing”. Go back to the start. Heidi Klum married Seal. So you guys are back again hopefully the ride wasn’t bumpy and you have understood everything till now. She was the hottest Victoria’s secret model, ever. So go back to the pervert meter and put in all the key word you find in this one paragraph and I’m sure I beat you. You thought you had beaten me didn’t you? After a lot of filth I cleaned all of that up with an industrial cleaner named Heidi Klum. Corrupt Indian Railways was the filth I was referring to. Laloo’s huge speech aboard the Intergalactic train. Anybody see the irony here? The chief of Indian Railways on the intergalactic train. Hold on have patience; obviously we shouldn’t wash our dirty laundry in public so we call it transportation.
If you still didn’t get it go back to the end of the line which is actually the beginning of the time wrap. Loop in the space time continuum. That’s where the Intergalactic train is the best vehicle known to human race. After that a meteor killed everyone on earth. “Human Park” in production. Spielberg makes billions and donates it to scientology.
It all started with the 9/11 incident which happened thousands of years ago in the US. Now even the sun is inhibited by humans. Working there in the nuclear reactors of the future. The crash set off a chain reaction of sorts. The meteor was pulled due to the shift in the gravitational pull of the sun. The orbit changed, Boom. The massive impact was not just from the train. The future reactors blew up throwing radiations all across the intergalactic space, a mess of infinite proportions. The suns radiations started causing small black holes. Within a blink of an eye everything was gone. Our native planet, earth will remain in all of our minds for ever. Our stupidity caused our end. Annihilation, synonyms I’m sure I spoke about them.
Gibberish can be anything. I should be a programmer with all that void and fancy language. Creativity is fun that’s what the voices say. They don’t stop until you need serious professional help. So I adhere to the voices. Spineless no slip disc, like the sun complex everything in ruins.
Frog porn visions with the dead frog on the table and the scalpel in my hand. Cheek to cheek smile, inside the grey mask. The answer is A.R. Rahman.