I DON'T KNOW: sometimes when i hear people talkin abt love i feel like puckin. i don't know why? 4 instance my friend was speakin abt a couple who loved 4 8 yrs & got married. i don't thnk its even possible 2 love someone 4 8 yrs. 4 someone like me its like a miracle. i've never been loved in my life. i don't know wat it feels like 2 be important or be loved. maybe tats why i hate tat word so much & belive tat it doesn't exist. it gives me peace of mind. i can at night{well actually i sleep when da sun is up}.
i haerd of tis guy who died in my college while on a trip & da funny part { i know 2 see someone's death as fun i must be really sick. weii i am} was tat no one realised tat he was dead or missing 4 a couple of hrs. well tis could easily happen 2 me. if i'm gone no one will realise it 4 atleast a couple of days. then someguy would say,"where is da freak who used 2 act like a smart guy?". probably by then they would have forgotten my name. some say everybody's life has a purpose, well i've never found out mine. if u don't have a purpose should u be alive. wat da hell am i doin here? this fuckin question has been killin me all my life. if u have an answer 2 tis i would love 2 know it.
one more thing if there is someone out there can teach me wat da hell love is all abt. i'd become their slave. tats a promise people.
nowadays i've become more friendly & tis is scarin me . i'm very afraid. i don't wanna get addicted 2 people. wen i'm alone there is tis peace tats soothin. i don't feel any pain. and when i do there is no one 2 judge me 4 havin tears in my eyes. i like loneliness. i can be me only with a couple of people, one of thm is always late & da other i don't know whether i should trust. but apart frm tat its just me. the shell is more beautiful than da outside world i should stay in it.......

THOUGHT:
thought-n; idea, opinion, intention, formed by thinkin. well i got none but i can't disappoint u guys. we humans beings use less than 5% of our brain cells, i know that is pathetic. imagine the consequences if we use all our brain cells, would we be happy then, would we put an end 2 all da wars or would we be more pathetic than ever. i'm sayin tis coz i thk people who are less intelligent r more happy. i've seen tat intelligence is inversely proportional 2 happiness. dumb people even mentally ill peoploe r more content but intelligent guys wanna justify everythin. so is intelligence a boon or a curse? one thing i forgot 2 tell u guys is wat intelligent means 4 me. i thk intelligence is da capacity 2 understand ones own thoughts. do we really understand thm. some say that theres life on other planet, some say there is god. well how da fuck do they manage 2 thk of all this shit, i don't understand. i'm skeptic i don't believe in all the crap i can't see, touch, taste, smell or hear. i've always been a skeptic. i always argue with my friends abt SETI & othr shit like tat. does tis mean i'm dumb? does tis mean i have no intelligence? if tis is true & i'm dumb then i should be really happy. right? but i'm not.....

DA GOD DAMN WAIT : Imagine tis u wait 4 somethin tats rightfully urs. But it gets delayed day after day. Well when tis shit happens 2 me I get pissed off. I mean really pissed off. I mean totally pissed off. I hate waitin. Like when someone promises 2 be at time, I expect thm 2 be at time coz I wouldn’t make thm wait if I were tat person. But my good friends r always late. I can take tis some extent if I’m waitin in a public area coz while waitin I like looking at people around me, their actions it’s a lot of fun. But da thing tat I hate is waitin 4 somethin tats materialistic in nature, I just can’t take tat shit. Well people say tat the fruit of patience is sweeter. 2 a certain extent I agree in tis. If ur really hungry the fruit tastes awesome. But at da same time if da fruit is messed up u get so pissed off tat u will chop down the damn tree even if ur hungry like hell. Tis has given me an awesome idea tat is when people fight they shouldn’t fight with a full stomach. This way primal instinct of killin 4 food will kick in and u will beat da shit outta tat guy. I guess tis is wat mike Tyson used 2 do. But in one fight his appetite got outta hand and he bit evander holyfields ear off. Right now I’m feelin like bitin off someones ear myself. I’m tryin 2 reach my own ear with my mouth and honestly I’m feelin a little dizzy. I’ll tell u guys if I succeed…..

Ps:crap I fell down da damn chair.

SUPERIOR:
who is more superior man or women. tis has been buggin us 4 ages. i thk women r more human than men. we men r more beastly, we thk thru our dicks while women thk thru their hearts (tat is da problem no one gives a damn abt da brain). we men can sleep with a 1000 women & don't even remember their names. whereas it is proven tat women get attached 2 da men they sleep with(i guess tats why female whores r more costlier than male gigolos). it is proven tat intelligent people live longer than dumb bastards (i'm not talkin abt da bonehead who stood in da middle of da road just 2 see how hard da bus can hurt u). it is also proven tat women live longer than men. hence women r more intelligent. women don't do dumb things like punch walls 2 just condition thr hands(maybe tats why they live longer). women thk before they make a decision. they don't fall 4 a guy who is just goodlookin, they will check out da financial security 2. well we men will marry a terminally ill women who will die da next day if she slightly resembles angelina jolie(i get a woody every time i say tat name).but after all tis if u give me a choice 2 be a man or a women i would chose a women any day. da reasons r- i can pee standin(cool). i acn jerk off any time & get full satisfaction, a girl on da otherhand needs a guy(tats why they use dildos). BIKES!!!! i can take my shirt off in public without people droolin at me. i die early. i dodn't have 2 give birth(dude when i watched tat video i totally freaked out. i thought i was watchin aliens). PAINFUL SHIT. its good 2 be a guy

WHAT?:
everythin happens 4 a reason. tat my friend is bullshit., so is -all 4 good. tat's my dad's favourite sayin. 4 me it doesn't make anysense. tat which makes sense 2 me is everythin happened 4 a reason. of all da things bad da main reason 4 it 2 happen is stupidity. there will always be one guy who will make a fool of himself even in a stupidity convention.
lets talk abt somethin else. how abt ants. ants coz i think they r extremely lucky . they know wat they r gonna do as soon as they r born. they r gonna be a soldier, worker or a damn queen who gats fucked a million times. we humans don't have tat luxury. we crack our heads tryin 2 figure out wat they r meant 2 do. in human race only artists & musicians know wat they were meant 2 do (guys! people like justin timberlake don't belong 2 tis group) & they r ofcourse da luckiest people alive. now 4 da luckiest animal i think its rats. i say tis coz rats can have as many sexual partners as they want, & a couple of rats can make 3000 babies in a yr. god damn i envy these guys. they live in sewers, so there is no shortage of thm, no problem 4 accomodation. they'll eat practically anythin coz they r rats. the cople of problems tat they face r godzilla & aliens. i mean cats 4 thm look like furry godzilla & humans look like aliens 4 thm coz of all da gadgets. i'm losin my mind i'll c u fellow aliens later.

WATEVER:
guys have u covetted sometin really bad. so bad tat u would do anythin 2 get it done. if u ask me tis, well i would have 2 say i haven't coz i feel there is nothin out there viz worth tat. on da other hand some people will do anythin 2 get wat they desire even kill someone 2 get it done. i frankly don't understand these insatiable assholes. like some say i wish i waz born in da us(i say tis 2. u guys know i'm an asshole. however i say tis only when i'm speakin abt sex. uknow wat i mean). i personally think there is no fun in livin in us everythin is served 2 u on a silver platter. i wish i waz born in iraq. right now i would be 19 & kickin some american ass in da war. i like hard situations & struggle. it hurts viz is da true human emotion. HURT. let me tell u some tats totally personell. i haven't spoken abt tis 2 anyone not even 2 my shrink. yes i'm looney. well we always think abt havin it all. eveyone's vulnerable in tis aspect. da guy who is poor wanna be rich. da guy who is rich wanna look like stallone(stallone coz i like him). da guy who we think has got it all would secretly wanna be a gal. da big question is how 2 get rid of tis.tis fuckin desire. some people say think of all da unfortunate people who don't have anythin. tat fuckin sucks coz ur seein thm as if they r dead. as if they don't exist as if u r better trust me u r not. those guys r more content. da best way 2 deal with it is don't try 2 live ur life(yes u read it right) don't try 2 live ur life. just survive tats all. just wait 4 da grim reaper. just survive till then....

GOSTBUSTER:
i'm sick of all da horror movies on tv these days. i don't believe in ghosts. but if they existed wat kind do u think would frighten da shit outta u? i think da one which wears da white sari & walks around holdin a candle is da most friendly of then all. i'm sayin tis coz i live in india here we have heck of a lot of power cuts. in tese situation its handy2 have a ghost which walks around holdin a candle. i shound start an agency which sells these ghosts its a million dollar idea. personally i like da ghosts that come outta da ground, u know da undead ones with their skins rotten & stuff coz tats wats gonna happen 2 us when we die. we become worm food. when we talk of ghost there r some things tat doesn't make any sense. why r there ghosts of only people. man is just an animal so technically ther should be ghosts of animals 2. we treat animals so badly there should be more animal ghosts.i have a more serious question- why r people so afraid of death? coz all our lives we know we r gonna die but still everyones' afraid. tats why i say life is just a wait 2 da inevitable. its a long wait isn't it? i saw tis quote da other day, let me quote it 2 u guys its beautiful. "life is pleasant. death is peaceful, its da transition tats troublesome" i think tis sums it all up.

UNDERWEAR ON DA PANTS?:
super heroes r everwher these days, on da internet, tv newspaper except in da real world. i aien,t speakin abt heroes but superheroes. when v were kids(some of us still r) v used 2 fight who is da better super hero. i saw a programme on tis subject which said batman waz da best & most popular. tis pissed me off coz my favorite was & still is spiderman. he is like us, he can't get a girl his boss hates him & is a good guy. when he got da power of crawln on walls he didn't say, "hey i'm gonna save da world today" in contrast he tried 2 make money outta it. he has got only 2 powers, he can climb stuff & has a sixth sense. tats all. da webin he made it himself coz he's got brains tats why i like him. now let me ask u a question. if u were a superhero wat powers would u like 2 have? i think abt tis a lot(yeah i'm nuts). i would like 2 have da power of invisibility & da power 2 go thru stuff(like a wall). when i'm sayin invisibility its not like my body is invisible so i have 2 b naked all da time. its like right now i'm typin tis hence my figers r touchin da keyboard so if i wanna make tis system invisible i can do it if i concentrate. i know it sounds a little geekish. don't forget i can go thru walls 2 so i can b a good peepin tom(yeah baby). every hero should have a villan, but in his case hedoesn't have a supervillan. his agenda is 2 bring pease 2 da world. lets give him a name how abt "peace maker", its a little dorky so is "superman". 4 a successful superhero he should have some weakness. his weakness r , well he can't fly so he has 2 travel by plane which ofcourse he can do free of cost coz he is invisible but it will take him time. second he is tryin s2 bring peace 2 da world, well peace is one thing mankind cannot achieve coz v have a curse called intelligence bestowed on us. so peace is an illusion that peace maker will always chase. lastly he is invisible 2 naked eye but infrared can detect him. now lets talk abt costume. i personally don't like da cape & underwaer over da pants costume. how abt tis peace maker will always wear white, he can wear anything he wants but it has 2 b white thats all. i'm sorry i gotta go there is a crisis. hastala vista guys. i'll b back. i guess

PS: da crisis was i had 2 go 2 da toilet

CALL IT WATEVER U WANT:
sometimes i wish i could fly. i would fly far far away where there r no humans. i wish i could live like an animal, free, no material possesions just free where da only worry is 2 survive. here in real world(which stinks) thre r so many parameters. people think so different. if we could just go back 2 our instincts earth would be such a beautiful place. but we covet stuff we need everything, from da neighbours wife 2 da film stars cars, we r 'nt satisfied, but why? its as if we r chasin some thing tat doesn't exist. what if tomorrow some one scientifically proves tat heaven & hell exists? will people start helpin people out 2 get in heaven? but is it valid 2 help people out just 2 get into heaven? tis is just greed, which is one of da seven deadly sins, so he has 2 go 2 hell. but nevertheless he has helped a person. so who da hell decides all tis shit? tats why i say we should abandon everything &live in forest in small communities just tryin 2 survive nothin else. da contentment we get in tis is unmatched. but we r caught in a game whose rule we don't understand, but still tryin 2 play without much sucess. hope we get lucky soon.

HUGE:
one of my biggest fears is goin naked in front of people. like in fear factor they asked a couple of people 2 walk naked on a ramp, my friend asked me if i would do it. i told him tat if i went first i got no problem, but if i go after a girl i got a HUGE problem. u know HUGE i mean HUGE. i would look like a fuckin coat hanger, i know its sick.
when i think of bein nude i think of tribal people who r always nude. imagine it would be so freaky one day a little kid goes 2 his father & says "dad i got pubic hair". then da question ARISES. no i'm not implyin' 2 anythin else. well 4 me da problem is when u r in a tribal group how da hell do u get aroused. everythin is right there, like when u look at a girl fully dressedu sometimes fantasize abt her body(if u don't then i'm a pervert) & when u see her naked u get aroused. its like wen a stripper strips in front of u tats hot & if she walks on to the ramp naked its not tat hot, its like u can't get aroused by ravi varma paintings
one more thing tat cocerns me in tis subject is if u see ur mom naked i bet u will never, i mean ever think abt girls again. but the tribal men see their bride & their mom butt naked at da same time(its ok if u puke now) . i really take my hats off 2 then 2 see their mom naked & go fuck their brides on da same day is an unbelieveable deed. i got 2 go now i got 2 clean my room there is puke everywhere
-da sick mind of girish

ps: i got 2 give my mind a new name. mail ur suggestions 2 st_agnostic@sify.com

INSOMNIAC:
i can't sleep. no i'm not insomniac, its coz the damn dogs in da streets r barkin like hell. i wish i had a Gun right now, i swear i would have blown fuckin brains outta their heads. u think its violent, u think i'm a bad person, if u do....... then screw u son of a bitch, tis is wat i am.
anyway wen u think of dogs & killin them u think of da great menaka gandhi. i hate tat bitch. she always preaches da common man 2 take care of da animals around them. well....... wat da fuck does she know abt da common man. imagine tis, a common middleclass man works all day long sometimes even 4 10 hrs a day . he comes home aftr a hectic bus ride which feels like riding a jam packed puke machine. he is tired has 2 take care of his kids, his wife da bills & all kinds of fucked up shit. then he goes 2 sleep, the dogs start barkin, now tell him 2 be good 2 da dogs, if u do, he will cut ur balls out fry them, powder them & will drink them with a glass of warm milk. but maneka gandhi doesn't know tis, she is some whore who lost her husband & wanna supress her desires by talkin abt freakin animals. there r more than i billion people in our country, thousands of them r dying every day and she talks abt some rabies infected dog. she just wanna hog da lime light & go 2 bed thinkin abt some horse or some bull or some

sorry guys its 3 am & i'm pissed of so bear with me
da freak
giri

pessimist:
hey people,
welcome 2 my space. let me tell u somethin abt myself. i'm an eternal pessimist, being a pessimist has served me well. when ur a pessimist u go into somethin without any expectations, hence ur never disappointed. 4 ex u go into an exam u think u did well, but u should always remember others correct these papers, they might not undrestand ur handwriting, maybe even forgot their spectacles or they r plain nuts, when u recieve da paper & its an F u get pissed off. some wossy may even think of killin himself, but i got no expectations. i would think "wat da fuck i'ma take da exam again". hence i th e pessimist will get an A in da next exam & da optimistic bastard would be dead.
so choose wisely would u like 2 be an optimist or a pessimist

ME
i have no idea wat the fuck i'm doin here. yes i'm new 2 this. ok lets talk abt universal crap called love, i don't believe in that bullshit i think love can b catagorised into 3 things they r FEAR, RESPONSIBILITY & GREED.
4 example:
* y do u love ur parents because its ur responsibility & u fear if i don't wat the hell will people think?
*y do u love ur girlfriend coz u wanna do her or u want a companion. that is fuckin greed
so according 2 me there is nothin called love its all bullshit

the 3 most important things in life according 2 me are:
*sex(lots of it)
*money(lots of it)
*friends(only a few loyal ones)

i know by know u would have realized that i'm a complete loser if u guys think this makes sense u guys r freaks but u can contact me people at st_agnostic@sify.com
bye